About the Ceremony
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Ritual Space
An old tradition in many cultures around the world holds that anyone who happens upon a wedding or a funeral is expected to join in, whether they know the people involved or not. The root of that tradition is one that suggests that what happens in these elemental rituals comes from a place deeper than the circumstances of those directly involved and so has the power to move, touch, and heal whomever is present.
In wedding ritual, the archetype that informs and saturates the ceremony is the union of opposites. This sacred energy carries within it the potential of union, healing, and reconciliation in any aspect of our lives, including wounded or broken places within ourselves and in our relationships. In that light, our desire was for the ceremony of our marriage to touch those present and ripple out into the world in a way that brings some much needed healing to a troubled world.
Spirituality
& Faith Traditions
"Love is the threshold where divine and human presence ebb and flow into each other,"
says John O'Donohue in his book, Anam Cara, which is Gaelic for "soul friend."Our journey together, as soul friends, has deepened and enriched our relationship with the Divine in all things. We find that Celtic Christianity, with its inclusion of both nature and community within the traditional Trinity, beautifully integrates our love of both Christian and Earth-reverent spirituality. The Celtic Cross, with its circle connecting the linear lines of the cross, speaks to the wholeness and connectedness at the heart of Jesus's message, honoring the Divine Feminine in full partnership with the Divine Masculine.
Elements of the Ceremony
The Village Gathers
The Village Sings:
Pura Samane / Pura Mamane (read more)Opening Prayer / Libations
Affirming and Honoring the Feminine & the Masculine
Honoring of Families
Words from the Community
Wisdom from the Women & Men
The Goblets
Ring Ceremony
Salute / Kiss
Pronouncement
The Village Celebrates
Wisdom of the Women & the Men:
Marriage in the Mandorla
Our ceremony took place within two interlocking circles made of branches and flowers, with an altar in the mandorla, the meeting place of the circles. These circles were there to reflect our coming together in marriage as well as to evoke and honor the greater Sacred Union of the Powerful Feminine and Positive Masculine which we see as essential for the co-creation of a world that works for all.
In one circle, Jane had three women at her side (Deborah Owens, Jerilyn Brusseau, and Susan Schroeer) and in the other, Dirk had three men (Raul Trevino, Hadi Jawad, and Hans Braun). The women's circle offered the wisdom of womanhood and grounded Jane in the essence of the Powerful Feminine. The men's circle shared the wisdom of manhood and stood witness to those qualities in Dirk that support the emergence of the Positive Masculine in the world. Each gave their blessing to the gifts that can come from that union.
After receiving the wisdom of the women and the men, we approached the Mandorla, the place of union, where our three officiants -- Rev. Clarence Glover, Betty Greene, and Walter Manley -- stood to greet us. Betty and Walter, our "gender guardians," each picked up a goblet containing water that had been blessed by an earlier women's and men's circle. (See below for history of the goblets.) Walter asked Jane, and Betty asked Dirk, in turn, if we were willing to drink from the cup of the others' gender -- with all its attendant joys, sorrows, conflict, and Mystery. As we agreed, we took a goblet in one hand and with the other, took our guardian's hand and stepped into the Mandorla.
Pastor Glover invited us to make our toasts and drink from each other's goblet. He then offered us each a taste from a cup of honey, symbolizing the sweetness, joy and rich satisfaction of marriage. Then we tasted a cup of vinegar, reminding us of the bitter challenges of conflict, illness, and death; and finally, he offered the cup of salt, in honor of that spirit that preserves love throughout life and beyond death. Being willing to share and tend to all three elements, he said, is key to a strong and lasting union.
The Goblets
We used two bronze goblets as an integral part of our vows of marriage, in honor of a great man and wonderful friend who was responsible for our two lives coming together.
In the early 90's, we were both drawn to the work of Danaan Parry, co-founder of the internaional Earthstewards Network. As an international conflict resolution specialist, Danaan had worked with warring factions around the world, including Northern Ireland, the former Soviet Union, and the Middle East. On one of those trips to the Middle East, his work with two Pakistani tribes -- one Muslim and one Christian -- went a long way toward healing decades-old conflict which had caused untold suffering for all involved. In gratitude, the tribes each presented him with one of a pair of matching goblets. In the years since then, the goblets have been used by Earthstewards across the planet in many celebrations, rituals, and ceremonies, including Danaan's own marriage to Jerilyn Brusseau in 1992.
Sadly, Danaan is no longer with us in body, having suffered a fatal heart attack in 1996. But we felt his bright and powerful spirit, so passionately devoted to union and reconciliation, as we prepared for the marriage. In the hour prior to the ceremony, we each took one of the goblets and gathered with some of our own gender. One by one, those gathered poured a small amount of water into our goblet as they spoke words of blessing and good wishes for our union. When the ritual was complete, Jane gave her goblet to Betty and Dirk gave his to Walter; both carried them into the ceremony and placed them on the altar.
When it came time to step into the Mandorla to take our vows, Walter asked Jane, and Betty asked Dirk, "Are you willing to drink from the cup of the Other, with all its joys, sorrows, , conflict and Mystery?" As we affirmed that vow we were invited to enter the Mandorla and our own goblet was handed to us. Honoring each other for our willingness to bring all of who we are to the marriage, we offered each other a drink from our goblets.
Then, turning toward our "village" we raised the goblets high to honor all our friends, family and colleagues -- both those in the body and those in Spirit. We then poured out the two goblets into the altar chalice, symbolizing our joined streams of blessing and the giving of ourselves and our gifts in service to our world and our community.
The Wedding Party
Minister
Rev. Clarence GloverOfficiants
Betty Greene
Walter ManleyWomen's Wisdom
Deborah Owens
Susan Schroeer
Jerilyn BrusseauMen's Wisdom
Raul Trevino
Hans Braun
Hadi Jawad
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[ The "Village" Gathers | Ceremony | Reception & Dancing | Afterward & Farewell ]
[ Acknowledgements | Poetry |
